Become
A Perfect Match |
| Before
seeking your perfect match, first try and become a
perfect match! |
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| Introduction |
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Although
there's no such thing as perfection, what the word should imply
may be preferred levels and pathways of achieving! Therefore, in
your effort to seek a life mate and the qualities that you are looking
for in the person whom you think would be your ideal soul mate,
try and see if you can match some criteria that would qualify you
in the other person's similarly stringent list. |
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| Seven
absolutely essential things that you need to do
in order to become a perfect match |
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| 1.
Be a good conversationalist |
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| What
does this really mean? After you have greeted your companion with
a wide, ear-to-ear grin, and said 'Hi!' enthusiastically, how do
you keep his or her attention focussed on you? Some things that
are always interesting, never fail to cheer are good humour, interesting
anecdotes and of course, the current most happening situation in
your side of town. Sensational news narrated in a vivid and dramatic
manner is a sure attention grabber. After humour, another essential
ingredient that adds spice and sparkle to any conversation is wit. |
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| Try
to be witty. If at first, it does not come naturally to you, read
and memorize those unforgettable one-liners that made some of history's
moments so memorable. Then, learn to deliver them with style and
panache. Of course, if you can recollect who said it and in what
famous occasion, it always adds to the grandeur of the occasion.
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However,
if you can master the skill of making a witty retort, without having
to draw on inspirational quotes from the great ones, so much the
better. Being witty is as much a skill that can be learnt as driving
a car. Wittiness is all about the appropriate play of words that
gives a different meaning or a new perspective of the same a situation.
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Go
through your old history books. Rummage around for those interesting
anecdotes about great men and women in history. Try and see if you
can trace out some of them, which you can link to any quality in
you, which you consider not so smart or savvy! See if you can add
a touch of glamour to those qualities.
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Interesting
anecdotes are not simply entertaining or endearing. Most importantly,
such anecdotes can be very inspiring and educational. To learn and
evolve to become a better human being is a quest that most of us
are undertaking consciously or unconsciously anyways. Wouldn't it
be better then to take a conscious step in this direction in a preferentially
entertaining way?
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Don't
commit the conversation blunder that the inexperienced are fond
of doing. They go so overboard in talking that they forget that
the other person too wants to share with you just as much verbally,
that you are sharing with that person. To be a good conversationalist,
you need not talk non-stop and gasp for breath.
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A
good conversation can be punctuated well by silent interludes, which
give one space and freedom to explore and reflect on the meaning
of words just spoken. More importantly, a good conversation should
really feel like a place where your mind can just go out, explore
and vibe in harmony with another mind.
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Remember,
the phrase, " talking like you are pouring all your heart out".
Well, there's much to be said for that. Don't spill out words by
the bucketful. Give time off for the other person to explore, conclude
and share with you some thoughts just as much as you are doing.
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Although
it is better to avoid gossiping totally, innocent gossip can sometimes
add to the fun of an interesting conversation. |
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2.
Read a lot |
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This
is an absolute essential! In today's knowledge based world, the
written word carries loads of attention, interest and genuine attraction.
Reading is not just a taste meant to be acquired and cultivated
by idle armchair philosophers. Reading has become an essential survival
skill. |
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| So,
whatever were your earlier notions about reading, you need to change
them. The person who reads is going to be the person who's going
to go out there and get those top positions or even rake in the
moolah in days to come. Of course, besides saying that reading is
important, what we wish to emphasize is that what you read about
is just as important. What we are trying to tell you is that you
need to develop an exhaustive and extensive reading list. In fact,
you can plan out all the books that you intend to read for the year
at the beginning of the year. If you already haven't done that exercise,
the next best thing that you can do is to make a monthly reading
list of books.
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You
must keep at least six to ten hours free every week to catch up
on your reading. Remember that if you read books on relationships,
on self-improvement, or good fiction, you are going to be learning
a lot. It's not just appreciating the literary skills of the writer
but rather that if you cultivate the habit of reading, it can be
a very powerful learning experience.
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In
a world, where nuclear families predominate and community living
is fading out, your best bet to learning in the absence of real
life situations would be to study interesting biographies of famous
people or interesting case studies or effective techniques and tools
as practiced by the masters or experts in different disciplines.
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Therefore,
you save a lot of time and energy in your life by learning from
other's mistakes and experiences shared through the written word.
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| 3.
Enrol yourself in self-improvement courses |
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Self-improvement
courses help sometimes in a big way, but more often in subtle ways
that you may not be able to clearly quantify. When you enrol in
a self-improvement course, it could be in a very diverse range of
subjects. If photography is your hobby, you could enrol in a course
on photography. That too could be considered as self-improvement. |
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| However,
in this article, what we mean by self improvement refers specifically
to your communication skills, to your interpersonal relationships,
to understanding all those gray areas that when simplified, explored
and understood, can much reduce the complexity of your relationships.
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Therefore,
we recommend that you enrol in courses that can guide you about
your attitude, your goals, your working style, your life plans,
and your ability to handle relationships, in short all those courses
that can enrich your emotional quotient.
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| Remember,
these are not areas that you must look down upon simply because
they have an element of femininity in them. Remember, being intuitive,
perceptive or really exploring the non-verbal regions of your mind
can add a new dimension to your life.
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4.
Travel |
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| Expose
yourself to the winds of different cultures and climates.
It will broaden your vision and perspective like few things
in life can. 'What's travelling got to do with one's love
life', you may ask. A lot! And that's probably a great understatement.
By travelling, we don't mean that |
| you
take the first flight and go on a trip round the globe. That
could help, but not get you exactly the results that we are
trying to communicate to you. |
| What
you need to do is to travel in such a way that you can get
down to understanding subtle cultural differences and influences
in other cultures that have shaped the attitude, growth and
evolution of that particular culture that you are exploring.
You may be amazed to know how much of a learning experience
it can be.
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| More
importantly, some preconceived ideas and notions that you
have about other people in other countries as well as your
own, may instantly evaporate when you come face to face with
the reality of the situation.
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5.
Exercise
By this,
we don't mean the 100 meter dash that you may do every
once in a while when you are late for the office or
some meeting. What we mean to say is that you need to
enrol yourself in a program of physical fitness. Either
get in to the habit of doing exercises on your own with
music or in some course or program. Exercise
helps ! |
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Not just to tone up your muscles but exercise may be
one of nature's greatest stress busters. Exercise helps
to open up all the tiny blood vessels in your body and
get the circulation healthy and going well. |
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| A
very aesthetically pleasing form of exercise would be
dance. If you can dance well, that's a very definite
asset. Dancing not just enriches your blood circulation
with all the vigorous movement of your muscles but also
gives you moments to ponder upon. Dancing can stir a
lot of positive emotions in your mind.
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| 6.
Relax |
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| Take
time off for yourself! For that nebulous soul
which needs space and time to be alone. You need
to remember at the end of each day that it's not
just a wonderful therapeutic aid to stay relaxed
but a very useful tool to achieve more.
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When you are relaxed,
your mind is calmer; you can think better and
stay more focused in your life.
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| Besides
that, you can also get some distance to see your
life and those of others around you with some
degree of objectivity. That can help as an extremely
effective tool to help you to relate to yourself
and to others in your life in a positive and enthusiastic
manner. |
| When
you are relaxed and refreshed, you communicate
the positive energies to all those around you.
That can translate in to a tremendous dynamic
force that can propel others in your life and
you to achieve the results that you are looking
for in your life.
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You
can relax in different ways. However, one thing
that you must not do is have the false idea that
if you sleep a lot, you are going to feel relaxed.
Remember, the more you sleep, the more you will
sleep. It's like a bad chain reaction. It may
not be at all that you feel relaxed or rejuvenated
after a deep sleep, unless of course you are sleep
deprived.
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| 7.
Eat well |
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By
saying this, we do not imply that you stuff your
plate with traditional food, fried in ghee and
oil. Rather, on the contrary, we ask you to exercise
some caution and care in choosing what you have
for dinner, lunch and breakfast and all the in-between
snacks.
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Things
that you must certainly avoid are soft, aerated
drinks, coffee, chocolate, fried stuff like hamburgers,
cheese sandwiches, pizzas, cakes and sweets.
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Always
remember that in the world that we live in, with
a population of 6 billion people, there are more
than 2 billion people who do not get enough food
to eat. Therefore, try at all times to eat to
live, not live to eat! Make that your guiding
philosophy in life.
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If
it makes you feel better, log on to the hungersite.com
where you can donate a bowl of rice everyday to
the world's needy and feel magnanimous, if a small
act like that can make you feel so.
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Current
theories that expert nutritionists believe in,
say that the best way to improve the quality of
your health and life is to eat a lot of nuts,
fresh fruits and vegetables. Have fruits as many
times a day as you can. Did you know that fruits
by themselves could make a complete meal? If you
think that's not true, check out what the experts
have to say on this.
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The
secret to staying healthy is to avoid adding any
oil, salt or sugar in any of your foods. Try it
for sometime and you will notice a tremendous
difference in how you feel. Your whole being will
feel lighter and more energetic. If you have to
add oil in your food, make sure that it's not
more than a teaspoon. Also, avoid having any milk
if you can.
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-
Conclusion
When
you are out there searching among all the
hopefuls for that 'Mr. or Ms. Right' in your
life, remember the same process is happening
in reverse. Someone out there is searching
for you. When they discover you, don't you
feel it's best that they come face to face
with the best side of you at the very first
encounter?
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