The actual wedding
is very short and does not have any hard and fast religious rules.
While modern life may have impacted traditional practices, most
Malayalee still observe the significant long-honoured customs.
Like every actual Indian matrimonial ritual, the 'Veli' is performed
around the Agni (fire). The bride and the groom circle the sacred
fire three times (instead of the usual seven they have in most
Indian matrimonials). The bride’s father ties the Taali
which is strung on a yellow thread around the neck of the bride.
(In other South Indian communities, the Taali is tied by the groom,
round the bride’s neck). Thereafter, the hand of the bride
is given into the palms of the groom. This matrimonial ceremony
is known as the ‘Kanyadaanam’ or ‘Penkoda’.
The Malayalee wedding ceremony of the ‘Sparsham’ then
takes place and symbolizes the meeting of the minds in oneness.
As the groom sits in front of the bride, he tilts his head backwards
to touch the forehead of the bride .The bride then offers Laja
(puffed rice) to the fire amidst the chanting of Vedic mantras.
The groom then lifts the bride's foot and places it on the Ammi
(grinding stone). In the Malayalee community, this gesture symbolizes
the breaking away of the bride’s ties with her family into
which she was born. The groom then lightly moves the bride’s
foot seven times to signify her entry into his home and family.
After the wedding ceremony a post - matrimonial reception is held.
The Malayalee wedding reception is a thoroughfare of traditional
and vegetarian food. After this, the couple leaves for the bride’s
matrimonial home preceded by lamps in what is called ‘Kudivep’.
At her husband’s house, she is welcomed with a lot of love
and affection. This is known as the ‘Grihpravesh’.
Since divorce is still strongly resisted within the Malayalee
communities, the religious authorities and families actively work
to help the parties to stay together.
